SLOW DOWN

... is the lesson I learned from my Witch of the West yesterday.

I told her I am a kind of person who would chose diving into the water to explore what’s inside than hesitating at the top of the cliff. It first happened in my high school days that I chose to go abroad for an international exchange student. My high school teacher said you would fail the university exam afterword, and my father supported my intention. I was not sure which was right, but I felt I had to try out, otherwise I never know whether it was a paradise or a hell covered deep in the water. I would go for a possibility of finding a treasure, at a risk of end up with a bunch of trash.

It came out to be right in my high school days, but not this time. Being in the biggest crisis in my life, I unintentionally speed up this process without really knowing what is going on. I am an extroverted type who wants to be healed in the intimate relationship with lots of people rather than being alone in solitude. Intimacy requires very delicate process in the long run. It falls into a blind pit and ends up in hurting people if you hurry up this process.

I have to learn to slow down my emotional speed. We tend to drive faster in distress. I know grieving is a long term process. I cannot hurry up myself. Take your TIME, Tiki.